No Regrets

I don't know if I am cursed or blessed in this case. Whenever I feel down, a few of my close friends will seem to have even bigger problems than me. Perhaps I kind of focus myself onto their problems, lending them my listening ear and after throwing in some cheap advise, when it's my turn to tell my story, suddenly my own problems seems to disappear. Maybe this is heaven's way of comforting me.

I'd always like to tell my close friends, if it can be solved with money, it's not a problem. To me, the worst problems are those that can't be solve with money. You can't buy all the time you need in the world with money if you have cancer. You maybe able to delay aging but you can never stop it with money. Whoever had passed on can't be brought back to life with money. You can't buy the smell of rain with money,can you? Like wise, no one can buy true love with money.

We are our own greatest enemy. We often kill ourselves with greed and envy. Contentment is the key to end all the sufferings. Those "what ifs" are also the top killers. I prefer to call them "cowardice". The fear of breaking out from the comfort zone. Comfort zone here means, things and situations that one are familiar. Sometimes when I get trapped, I would tell myself this, if my great-grandmother didn't have the courage to sail in that Chinese Junk, I would still be in China or maybe never be born. I shall sail on and make my own journey to add a brand new exciting chapter to my family history.

I don't know what's my future gonna be. Not that I don't care. I'm doing all I can at my best. For one thing that I'm certain is, during the last 5 minutes of my life on my deathbed I'd be smiling, because I know I did all I can for things I love to do. No regrets.

Blaaaaaaaa!

Blaaaaaaaa! I didn't do well in my audition. "Not My Day", is not a good enough excuse in my line of work. Actors are supposed to be master of emotion, I thought. However I was a dead fish. I need to slap myself 10 times for that. It's not about getting the job. It's about doing well. Moving on and will do better next time.

Met up with TC and J. We hung out at TC's studio for wine. 3 of us chatted till 4am. Today I was at wake of HC's grandmother. I'm so proud of HC because he never gave up his dream of being a commercial pilot when many around had laughed at his "foolishness". Now he's flying for the best airline in the world. The best part about him is that he's still the down to earth person I know.

Meeting PaPaP on Friday for birthday celebration dinner. This is gonna be so fun!!!

I haven't spoke to my elder niece for 3 days. I'm still very much upset with her. Blaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!

Audition & Preparation

It's time to work! I don't know if I would get the job but I'm happy to be called up for an audition. Its almost 3am now. Gotta focus on my preparation. Gotta break a leg!

Cheers!

Announcement

I need to earn some school fees for my acting classes. I'm trying to raise 50k to continue my acting education in Los Angeles. Hence, Nuffnang ads have been added to this blog. Please bear with me.

Thank you for your kind understanding.

Mirror On The Wall

Mirror
A Monologue Written By Da Diva
(Work in Progress)
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Woman(late 20s- early 30s)walks into the bathroom talking to the mirror.

You're so careful with things, people you'd care. No I mean to people you think who are worthy in your strange hidden world. You are certainly careful with gifts people sent you as you'd always say, every gift is a thought and well wishes. You always get upset when things broke down, even for a cheap pen. How's that for a person like you? Sweet, wonderful, charming. How's that I never get to understand, the part for the only thing you'd break is me, no second thoughts. How strange... Its amazing how you could love and hold on to someone you hated? How's that? (laughs) This is really funny. Nope I'm serious, no I'm not. I mean really, funny. You know what's the most funny thing is? (long laugh)(beat beat beat)Me.(beat)MEEEEEE! I knew it all along. You fu*king hate me! You FU*KING hate me! (Calms down) Yet I'm still here.(long beat, interrupted by sound, turns her face to the door then puts on her smile)Yes honey!? In the bathroom! Just two more minutes please! (faces back to the mirror) I don't know how you do it. I don't know how I did it. (Quickly tidy up her make up and leave the room)

Before Sunrise

At 630am I walked to the fridge at the balcony to get myself a drink. Yeah I know, don't ask me what's my fridge doing in the balcony. Its a two door fridge to store drinks, ice cream, chocolates, cakes, candy, fruits and a salted fish for the family.

Anyway..........

It was a long night as I was following the news about the depressing Dow Jones that had closed at 8579 and of course I was also busy with my face book games. Just as I was trying to visualize about whats gonna happen to our country and world's economy in my head, I walked to my fridge to get myself a drink and that's when I saw the first ray of hope.

I haven't seen such beautiful sky for a long time. It put a smile on my face. I suddenly got the urge to grab my passport and hop onto a plane so that I can immerse myself into the art of the universe. I'm dying inside to explore foreign land. To be able to experience sunrise at the Pyramids of Egypt or Machu Picchu would be totally perfect. However, I must first make my way to Adam's Peak. I regretted for giving up the plan to make my way there as I was overly tired with all the climbing and walking in other parts of Sri Lanka. That was 10 years ago.

Then again, the sun rays reflected on the HDB apartment blocks in view reminded me this. What sunrise can be as beautiful to be compared to as having my whole family sharing the experience with me under one roof even they were still snoring in bed at 630am?

I say, I have had experienced the perfect sunrise of all, this morning, at home.

Heart Attack At The Bank

I was at the bank today to withdraw from my unit trust investment as the market is really bad. True enough I lost total of 2k. ARRGH..... Oh well , at least I didn't lose everything.

The thing is the guy who served me at the bank today held the title of Personal Wealth Manager. Yet he didn't know CPF account number is the same as NRIC/ID number.... I was shocked when he asked me that question. He even doubted me.

The funny thing is he told me that my withdrawal from the investment will be dated tomorrow. He dared me that I should know this is the case since I make investment and as a front line he has to prepare me about it. I couldn't believe my ears! Every seconds in stocks, funds, forex can mean life and death. I know this very well because I used to trade in Forex. When a customer/client tell you to sell, you gotta sell immediately. Any further delay will cost possible losses. Time is really money. Wait till tomorrow?? What if the market crash again tomorrow? This is unfair to me. He just shrugged his shoulders.

I text messaged my friend who is the VP of the bank and he replied me that it has to be dated today. So I told that Personal Wealth Manager that it should be dated today. His explanation was the documents may not make it to the central on time.... I check the clock on my phone, it screamed 930am. So I told him that his VP told me that there's no problem and no reason why it wouldn't be dated today. Guess what the Personal Wealth Manager said? "Okay if the VP says it can be done then it can be done." I wanted to vomit blood at this point. What kind of answer is this?

I explained to him that I am not trying to tell him because the VP is my friend so that means I can cut queue and make unreasonable demands. But time is money especially in this case, no banks in the world does things like that. He just simply nodded his head. My heart almost burst and die on the spot. I picked up my phone and called my friend to double check again. I freaked out as its lots of money I'm talking about, well at least to me. My friend told me to take his name card and if transaction are not done today. He will file a complain.

It was then he asked me for my CPF account number. As I mentioned earlier he doubted me telling him that CPF number is the same as NRIC/ID number, he asked his boss for help. His boss came to his desk and confirmed that I was right. Then I took the chance to ask his boss if my withdrawal would be dated today. His boss ensured me that transaction will be done to date as they will do the faxing today. After the boss left, he the personal wealth manager finally admitted to me that he's new. At this point I almost burst out laughing. I told the poor stress out manager to relax and take his time to do the documentations.

I text message my friend again after I left the bank and told him about the poor newbie personal wealth manager who didn't know that CFP account number is the same as NRIC/ID. My friend's reply to me was "Haha Must give chance. All of us has been newbie before.Testing time now."

I totally agree. I am glad that I didn't scream, shout or bang table to get my withdrawal done. I can't get angry at the new guy. Do you remember your first day at work? Because I do. Me the famous blur queen who had made many customers vomited blood.

Swimming Cat

I'm back from the pool.
I swam but only 10 laps. The good thing is I didn't eat my strawberry sponge cake with peanut on the side, yet. I'm still glad I went swimming because I'm feeling good.
I'm so gonna swim again on Thursday.

Most of all, I'M SO GONNA EAT MY STRAWBERRY SPONGE CAKE WITH PEANUT ON THE SIDE NOW!